Smuttynose Pumpkin Ale

Appears brown with bright amber hues. Mild pumpkin spices in the nose (ginger); pumpkin puree.

Hoppy up top with slighty aggressive spice notes underneath.

Medium bodied. Mouthfeel is well balanced with bitter qualities, wet avenues & a lingering finish.

Abita's Satsuma, Seasonal Harvest Wit

Brought an Abita Brewing Co Party-Pack to a friend's house last night, and out of the three brews I hadn't had yet, this was the most impressive to me.

Pours a cloudy straw-yellow body with a spotty, white head. Carbonation bubbles rising to the top.

Smells of spicy yeast, cloves and nothing out of the ordinary for the style. Faintly boozy.

A prickly wheat dryness in the feel at first, but a bit watery later on. Light-bodied. Grains and a mild hint of lemon zest in the taste. Hop oils seem to battle it out with the hop bitters.

Notes: I feel like I should have served this to myself at a colder temperature, say 45 degrees F(it's probably around 50 degrees F). However, this brew is very enjoyable, and perfect for summer months. I wouldn't mind seeing it come winter.

Pairing: Penn Pilsner & Steelhead Trout

Paired my last Penn Pilsner (from a six-pack) with a filet of steelhead trout, spiced rice and beans (gifted leftovers) and stale bread. I pan-fried the trout and poured the beer in a Czech pilsner glass like a pro. As tasty as the meal was, let's focus on the brew.

Penn Pilsner looks golden-copper with a frothy, thin white head. Carbonation bubbles rising to the top.

Smells of light, golden malts. Some floral notes from hops. An underlying sweetness, but very balanced.

Dry flashes, a malted body, and a prickly finish. A dash of caramel malts sweetens the delivery and follows through to the finish.

Some days this hits the spot and other days, not so much. Today happens to be a good one. Sessionable at what, 4% ABV? Have mercy.


I miss this label.

Stevens Point Brewery's Burly Brown

A six-pack of various brews from the wife for our 2nd anniversary and I pull out Stevens Point's Burly Brown first. Labeled as an American brown ale, the brew pours dark brown with mahogany-red spots towards the bottom.

Slightly transparent for a dark brown beer; noticeably carbonated. Slim head, but a nice rim grips the edges.

Smells of caramel with traces of diacetyl; buttery. A smidget of booziness in the nose as it warms up. Tastes brown! Attenuated, but for the purpose of rendering this brew sessionable. Hops to balance. Give this one a try. On tap anyone?

Thanks, Bay.

Bad Monkey Chimp Chiller Ale

About 4 years ago in a bar my girlfriend (now my wife) and I frequented often, the bartender offered a new beer from the cooler. If my recollection serves me correctly, it was humorously called Butt Monkey. The brew with the ridiculous name was made in the state of Pennsylvania so I was inclined to give it a go. Long story short, it tasted pretty much like your average adjunct lager, but maybe a tad bit more interesting.

Maybe the brewery realized that no one was interested in drinking a beer that didn't even have enough respect for itself to bear a name that avoided references to one's back end. Seeing the brew for the first time since that night four years ago just a few weeks prior to this writing at the distributor I work at on weekends, the brewery has evidently gone the safer route with the name of Bad Monkey.

It appears tarnished gold with a head that disappeared in less than a minute's time. It smells like an eviscerated pilsner: wet malts, mild grassy hops and nothing more.

In the mouth it unenthusiastically delivers a slightly tangy hops note upfront with an extremely mild malt bill. The presence of caramel malts is just barely in the room. A glimse of the fruity ale characteristic comes through in the feel and finish (probably the best feature to this beer).

Somewhere I heard or read that Bad Monkey is in the area of 6% ABV, but the grains required to make that a positive attribute clearly did not make the cut. What I mean to say is, this a concoction that's had 100% fermentables added to the recipe to both thin out the final product and raise the alcohol content.


Proof that I wasn't crazy when recalling the "Butt Monkey" story.

Samuel Smith's Taddy Porter

I've been putting this brew off for far too long, but enjoyed myself in the process, imbibing dozens of other great beers (and some sub-par ones along the way). I'm letting it sit out a little (it's been 10 mins). Like many of the English styles, a traditional porter is best served at around 50-55 degrees F.

I'm staring at a 550 ml bottle that I bought at my local mammoth grocery store for $3.99 out the door. The neck is wrapped in fancy gold foil. The bottle is fancy as well with the brewery name embossed above the stomach, say the chest of the bottle. It's been 20 minutes. This beer is calling me...

Almost pitch black with translucent mahogany-brown shades near the bottom. A cola-beige head sits atop, fluffy and incredible. Smells of deeply rich malts, dark chocolate, prunes, figs, burnt brown sugar,  moist raw cane sugar, and butter (baby). LATE ADDITION UPDATE: as it warms, a friendly boozy note.

Taste is so approachable it makes me want to ask every bartender in town to serve this on-tap. Who am I kidding? Back to reality (and oh my am I enjoying it)...bittering hops afloat a hefty dark malt bill. Creamy, but more than enough hops to shake things up; I'd say the ideal amount.

The body is medium to heavy or somewhere between an early Roy Jones, Jr. and a Larry Holmes in his prime (my pops will like that one, that is if he reads this blog).

I'm relishing the fact that I've still got another 8 ozs or so left to enjoy. I need time alone with this one. Cheers!

Notes: this one is reminiscent of Guinness Extra Stout, and that is certainly a good thing.

Show Some Respect...Drink From the Glass

One of the most difficult things for a normal person to do is to point out proper etiquette (or the lack thereof), especially when it comes to beer. Reason being: it makes the "pupil" feel like a total slouch, and it makes the "teacher" look and sound like a condescending "know-it-all." Maybe that's why the world-wide-web created blogs: so people can learn without suffering through awkward confrontations and mild feelings of worthlessness.

It wasn't that long ago now that I routinely drank from the bottle. I did so at restaurants (and still do if my server is ultra-unresponsive to simple requests), bars, you name it. And to be totally honest, you'd be hard pressed to find me bugging the host of a big pool party for a glass to pour my beer in, especially when I've shown up empty handed. There's a time and a place to be picky and finicky, and a big party isn't one of them.

On the other hand, a friend's house, your in-laws...go for it. Pour the frickin' beer in a glass (unless of course it's yellow, fizzy and light...chances are it probably doesn't smell very appealing).

Some folks just don't gather what all the fuss is about. Are you one of them? Well, if so, let me break it down in Lehman's terms for you. When you have some wine at your in-laws over Thanksgiving dinner, needless to say, you drink from a wine glass, not the bottle, correct? Do you sip on bourbon from the mouth of a fifth, or are you rational enough to pour a few ozs into a proper glass (Google brought up the overture glass, but I don't typically drink hard liquor so otherwise I wouldn't have a clue)?

Assuming you answered "glass" to both questions above, why is it so hard to apply the same logic when it comes to a good brew? The only answer I can come up with that makes sense is this: the general public doesn't respect beer enough, yet. Yeah, we're getting there, but we've got a long way to go. Most beer drinkers still drink the same beer on a regular basis. Most beer drinkers term any beer that's golden-yellow a pilsner. Some of that vast majority thinks Rolling Rock is a pale ale simply because it says "extra pale" on the label (as if their lager isn't pale, which may actually be news to them since their drink-from-the-bottle habit knocks seeing the beer out of the equation). Get where I'm going with this? America is home to an ignorant majority when it comes to beer. That's not me being a snob, that's just plain fact.

Show some respect...drink from the glass (at least do it for me. I'm not drinking one tonight).



Why a full glass is paired with a full bottle I'll never know...

Witbiers and Cow Piss

I can still remember when I first had Blue Moon. Or at least I think I can. If I recall correctly, I was visiting relatives in Queens, NY with my brother and a few of our friends. Our cousin Carla took us to Bell Blvd, a quieter yet still happening area just ten minutes from our aunt's house. We could hop to a few different bars without having to drive or fight our way through big crowds.

There she was. A glowing sign that said "Blue Moon." Also on tap, eh? Probably the best beer I had yet. Then there was Sam Adams Boston Lager, although I didn't truly understand it's brilliance at first sip, or even first pint. That's another story.

From what I've gathered about my generation, Blue Moon was a branch-out beer for a lot of people . It's still decent to me today, but I've grown beyond it. As usual, it's better on-tap than out the bottle (note: Coors has started canning Blue Moon but I've yet to try it. I don't mean to complain, but they've hardly offered a price incentive).

Despite my distant relationship with Blue Moon nowadays, I'm reminded of a funny story involving my father and my insistence that he "give it a try." My Blue Moon craze was fresh at the time. I must have had a six-pack of the stuff in the fridge, and I think it was a Saturday afternoon.

"Want to try a Blue Moon, Dad?" I asked invitingly. "No, thanks," my dad politely replied. "You sure? It's good stuff. It's a wheat beer," I urged further as if that was going to change the mind of a man who hadn't switched up the brand of beer in the fridge since before I started noticing the poison stickers on potentially toxic household items. To my surprise, "Okay, just a little." So I poured 3-4 ozs of a cloudy amber-orange Blue Moon in a 6 oz juice glass for my old man.

"Tastes like cow piss."

I still like yuh Blue Moon, even if you're a bit of a farce.

Drinking: Long Trail Belgian White. A cloudy golden-yellow face with a pleasant orange peel aroma. The wheat pushes a nice dryness to the beer while the hops add to the feel and flavor. Citrusy, yet not over the top. Belgian yeast adding that trademark spiciness. Tasty and refreshing. Certainly a solid offering from Long Trail.
   

Stoney's Gold Crown Premium Beer

I found this brew on the Stoney's website (http://www.stoneysbeer.com/), and after discovering that it's been the center of zero attention on the world wide web, I decided to request it at the beer distributor I work for. My guess is it's only available in a few areas, likely in six-pack shops in and around Smithton, PA.

First off, the Stoney's website image of this brew is deceptive. I don't see the near-copper golden body pouring out of my 16 oz can. It appears plain gold with a little tarnished yellow.

Extremely mild in smell. Wet malts and grassy hops.

Palatable for sure, but notably bland. Hops to balance, if that's possible. There's barely any maltiness to speak of, so I guess this brew is relatively hoppy.

On the lighter side, but fuller than say a Coors Light. Also, it's probably more enjoyable out the can than in the glass. However, that's not to say it wouldn't be better on-tap. Just my assumption.

Note: had I not received an employee discount, a flat of 24 16 oz cans would have cost me about $15.



Uh huh, that's a good one.

A Beer That's Not Really a Beer: Shiner Ruby Redbird

Okay, so it's a fruit beer, and fruit beer's really don't taste like traditional beers with a solid malt bill.

Shiner Ruby Redbird is kind of like a ginger ale, but with alcohol. I'm talking about a serious ginger ale, not the mass produced "natural flavors" ginger ale.

In my light it looks amber-orange. The head left in a hurry. It smells of ginger up front with the sweet bitterness of grapefruit in the shadows. Again, it tastes and feels like a ginger ale. My guess is there is not one cultivar of hops listed in the ingredients for this recipe, but I haven't seen the blackbook of the brewmaster. Call it a hop-free beer if you can stand to imagine such a blasphemous concoction.

Refreshing? Yes. Satisfying? Sure. Does it stand a chance when I've got a choice between it and Bell's Amber Ale or another favorite of mine, Sierra Nevada's Torpedo? No. That being said, nice try.

I like you Shiner Ruby Redbird, but I don't love you.

Poperings hommel ale

Notes from 5/17/11

330 ml/11.2 fl oz bottle poured into goblet-like wine glass.

Appears cloudy blonde-gold with a creamy white head. Some visible carbonation, but a fairly opaque body.

Spicy esters of belgian yeast, ripe bananas and pineapple juice shoot forward in the nose. A woodsy aroma coupled with a warm alcoholic presence sits faintly in the backend. A nutty caramel aroma delivers as it warms up.

A bold graininess hits the palate first, followed by yeasty notes and a creamy, yet prickly hop finish. Citrusy hop oils linger a bit before prefacing a nut-dry finish.

Fruity ale characteristics in the feel of this brew. Delicate at first glance with a fiercer second opinion. Hops aid in creating a creamy body. Medium bodied on the lighter side.

Beer Styles, Not Flavors

Am I a beer snob for adamantly asserting that beer variations, particularly when dealing with beer brands, should not be referred to as "flavors?"

No, I think not. I'm just a fella who likes real beer and thinks the variance label that is "flavor" belongs to the malternative, juice beer stuff that's way overpriced.

Beer on the other hand is probably the most diverse beverage on the face of the earth. With literally dozens of styles to choose from, beginning with whether or not it's an ale or a lager you're going to be imbibing (...maybe another column I'll vent on the public misconception related to ales and lagers), beer is far more complex and therefore should be more highly regarded when advertised/promoted than say...soda pop.

With a few exceptions, most microbrew beers are not a simple concoction of a bland canned pilsner and a [you fill it in] flavoring extract. No, all one needs to do is leave that up to the big domestics who are currently deluding the public with faux microbreweries and brands. That being the case, why promote real micro products like they're sitting on a shelf next to a case of Capri Sun?

By using an adult word like "style" instead of the kid friendly noun that is "flavor," you--advertising distributors--are speaking to the right market (people 21 and over), avoiding frustrating the women (and some men) that thought [you fill it in] was going to taste like juice beer and, most importantly, helping to enlighten the many people still out there that think of beer in the most simple, barely nuanced way: light, heavy, dark.

And on that note, I could really go for a munich dunkel lager right now.

 By my estimation this gentleman is likely drinking an Irish dry stout (an Irish ale like Guinness Draught)

Penn Brewing's Weizenbock

Notes from 5/1/2011 -

22 oz bottle with no freshness date.

Appears opaque brown with a creamy, nougat colored rim. Yeasty in the nose. Spicy & aromatic. Dry wheat tones help balance out the overall aroma. Lively spices with alcohol clearing a path.

Feels creamy up front with enough hops in the finish. Malty sweet; over-riped bananas. Yeasty flavors dry on the tongue. A little bit of the alcohol shows. Medium mouth-feel on the delicate side. Enjoyed this one.